IN SEARCH
OF ASSURANCE
K.K.ALAVI

IN SEARCH
OF ASSURANCE
K.K. ALAVI
THE GOOD WAY • RIKON/SWITZERLAND

RB 7825 E
All rights reserved
THE GOOD WAY • P.O.BOX 66 • CH-8486 RIKON (SUISSE)

This is my story. But it is not only my story. It is the
story of God's goodness to me: how he loved me and
showed me his salvation. Let me begin at the beginning.
MY CHILDHOOD
I was born on Friday, July 15,1951. My father was a
mulla (a Muslim religious leader) in the small village of
Cherukunnu in the South Indian state of Kerala. Every-
one in the village respected my family because we were
strictly religious. My father's special duty was to read
from the Qur'an in Arabic to our Muslim neighbors. Yet
he did not forget to teach his own children.
I can still remember sitting on my father's knee after
evening prayers, hearing him recite the Qur'an and learn-
ing from him. Every day began and ended with readings.
from the Qur'an and prayers. This strict discipline
affected our whole home life.
At the age of five I went to the nearby madrasa
(Muslim religious school) to learn Arabic, so that I could
study the Qur'an. We also had ordinary lessons. When I
was ten years old, I was sent to a regular school at
Kottakal not far from home, where I studied for a year
and a half. However, I could not finish my education
there for reasons that will become clear.

AN EVENTFUL DAY
One Saturday, the market day at Kollakkal, when I
was going home from school with my friends, we saw a
large crowd in the market place. We went over and found
a group of Christians there. They were telling the crowd
about their faith — stories from the life of Jesus and
selling Christian booklets. At first we laughed at the
Christians and made fun of them. In spite of this, we
bought two of the booklets. Mine was called "The Heart
of Pak" and my friend got one about "The Way pS
Salvation." On the way home we talked about the book-
lets and about Christians. My friend tore his copy into
pieces. I kept my booklet although I despised Christians.
When I reached home, I sat down in a quiet place and
started to read "The Heart of Pak." There was an
interesting conversation in the book between a Christian
and a boy. As I read, I wondered if the Jesus of this
booklet was the same 'Isa whom I knew about as a
prophet. To my mind, the Jesus of this booklet was
different from the Jesus of the Qur'an. Now I read that
this Jesus could forgive sins. Yet this very forgiveness of
Jesus had changed (transformed) the boy, and it made
me love Jesus.
When I read of this boy's spiritual plight, I felt as
though the Christian was speaking to my heart also. In
fact, I considered my heart to be in worse condition than
the heart of this youth. How could t find freedom from
this spiritual disease? The booklet offered the cure. I

rejected it because I had been taught that God alone
forgave sins — not Jesus, the prophet.
Nevertheless, I could not free myself from the strong
argument in the booklet. I became uncomfortably aware
of my own sinfulness. What would become of me when I
died? I could not escape death or the Day of Judgment. I
made up my mind to find out more about Jesus with the
help of a correspondence course advertised in this book-
let.
FURTHER STUDY
The correspondence course center promptly sent the
course. Unfortunately, the postman delivered it to my
uncle to give to me. He opened it and discovered its
Christian contents. The next day he showed it to my
father and my uncles. They decided to end this study
before it began!
That same evening when I came back from school, my
father tied me to a pillar of our verandah and beat me
with a stick until I felt weak. The next morning he called
me and spoke lovingly to me; He said, "We Muslims
should not read such books. They are forbidden, espe-
cially the books of the Christians. Since their books are
so attractive, we, too, will become Christians if we read
them. What will happen to our family then? It will ruin
our whole life. Our community will reject us, and it will
be a curse on Islam." I promised my father that I would
never again read these books.

I tore up the booklet and burnt it cursing myself for
failing to do what my friend had done earlier with his
book. From that time on, I became a devout Muslim
reciting daily prayers. Yet as the days went by, I lacked
peace of mind whenever I remembered the booklet and
thought about the condition of my heart.
How could I forget the name "Jesus" when I repeated
it every evening in my recitation of the Qur'an! So I
decided to make a study of Jesus in the Qur'an and in
other Muslim books. I did not know much Arabic, but I
persevered in my study with help of a friend — Yusuf
Mawlawi. He was a Muslim teacher in an Arabic school
near our house and a close friend of our family. I found
that 'Isa has a very important place both in the Qur'an
and in the Hadith or Muslim tradition. In the Qur'an it
seemed to me, 'Isa was even more important than my
prophet Muhammad. Soon both the teacher and my
family became suspicious about my desire to learn more
about Isa. They gently suggested that I concentrate more
on Muhammad. Still I continued to wonder about those
Quranic passages which referred to Jesus, to his unique
birth, and to his marvelous deeds.

"(And remember) when the angels said: O Mary! Lo!
Allah giveth thee glad tidings of a word from Him,
whose name is the Messiah, Jesus, son of Mary, illustri-
ous in the world and the Hereafter, and one of those
brought near (unto Allah).
He will speak unto mankind in his cradle and in his
manhood, and he is of the righteous.
She said: My Lord! How can I have a child when no
mortal hath touched me? He said: So (it will be). Allah
createth what He will. If He decreeth a thing, He saith
unto it only: Be! and it is.
And He will teach him the Scripture and wisdom, and
the Torah and the Gospel.

And will make him a messenger unto the Children of
Israel, (saying): Lo! I come unto you with a sign from
your Lord. Lo! I fashion for you out of clay the likeness
of a bird, and I breathe into it and it is a bird, by Allah's
leave. I heal him who was born blind, and the leper, and I
raise the dead, by Allah's leave. And I announce unto
you what ye eat and what ye store up in your houses. Lo!
herein verily is a portent for you, if ye are to be believers.
And (I come) confirming that which was before me of
the Torah, and to make lawful some of that which was
forbidden unto you. I come unto you with a sign from
your Lord, so keep your duty to Allah and obey me."
(3:45-50)
I noticed also that the Qur'an refers especially to the
Tawrat (Old Testament) and the Injil (New Testament),
exhorting me to believe in them because they are "guid-
ance and light" (5:46). Another verse in particular came
to my mind often:

"And if thou art in doubt (Muhammad) concerning
that which We reveal unto thee, then question those who
read the Scripture before thee..." (10:94)
When I read this verse, I remembered the Christians
and their booklet. According to Islam, Christians also
are ahl ul-kitab (the People of the Book). If the Qur'an

encouraged Muhammad to share his doubts with Chris-
tians, then why not me? Yet it was difficult for me to
approach Christians. I had so little contact with them.
Besides, my family would hardly approve!
Not far from my home there is a Christian Mission
Hospital. One day a friend, Abdulla, and I determined to
go there secretly. When we arrived the hospital pharma-
cist, Mr. Kunyukunyu, kindly directed us to the mission-
ary. We were young and nervous and did not know what
to expect. But the missionary greeted us in a friendly way
and made us feel at ease.
After some discussion the missionary suggested that
we attend Sunday School classes and directed us to the
Christian reading room. There we met the reading-room
worker. Later he became my very close friend and a true
brother who helped me in many troubles. He enrolled
me in a correspondence course based on the Gospel
according to John. Both Abdulla and I attended Sunday
School for several weeks without the knowledge of our
parents. Sometimes my friend kindly gave us bus fare;
sometimes we walked the five mile distance. On one
occasion some of our neighbors caught us. They ques-
tioned Abdulla and beat him until he finally revealed our
secret activity.
Next evening, when I returned from school, I saw my
mother and younger sister crying: They knew what my
father had already prepared for me. As I entered the
house, my father suddenly appeared, shouting. He
caught me, tied me up, put me against a wall, beat me
and rubbed ground, green chili on my face and in my

eyes — all the while asking me why I read Christian
books and associated with Christians. My mother faint-
ed. After some time, with the help of a neighbor woman
and my sister-in-law, I was taken to a water tank and
washed.
The following morning my father called me and asked
me to repeat the Muslim creed: "There is no god but
Allah and Muhammad is the prophet of Allah." He led
me through the recitation. Then he warned me about
Christianity, its false teaching about Jesus Christ, the
corruption of the Holy Injil and the bad lives of Chris-
tians. He asked my sister-in-law to burn my Christian
books which she did. All this affected me greatly, and I
cried bitterly. I had no peace of mind, for my opportun-
ity to learn more about Jesus from the Gospels and
from Christians friends had been frustrated.
When I went to the place where I burnt "The Heart of
Pak," I sorely regretted the destruction of the booklet.
As I recalled the conversation in this booklet, the same
tension once more confronted me: the boy's joyful expe-
rience of forgiveness and the heavy burden of sin which
lay on my own heart. As a Muslim, I had learned that we
ourselves are responsible for our sins; no one else can
bear another's burden (Qur'an 6:165). Then how, could
Jesus forgive anyone? Nevertheless, I prayed to God for
further guidance.
An awareness of my own sin never left me. It gnawed
at my heart continually. After two weeks, I felt again a
strong desire to see my Christian friends. I had to share
my difficulties and doubts. The missionary encouraged
10

me and answered my questions about Christian beliefs
and practices. Most of his answers satisfied me because
he also knew the Qur'an and Muslim faith.
I returned home with a copy of the whole Gospel
which my friend had given to me. Although I was very
glad to have it, I was afraid that someone at home might
see it. So I put the Injil in a plastic bag and hid it under a
stone in the forest. I often went to the forest to read it,
especially St. John's Gospel. One verse, the words of
Jesus, gave me some consolation:
"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in
God; trust also in me." John. 14:1
The words "believe also in me" impressed me greatly
at that time. Although I was anxious and troubled, this
verse comforted me.
The next Sunday, while on my way to Sunday School,
I noticed my uncle on the same bus. I trembled at the
thought of what my father would do to me after my
uncle reported to him. In spite of this, I attended Sunday
School and spent some time with the missionary.
Before I met my new Christian friends, I had strong
feelings against Christians because I had heard such bad
reports about them. Yet when I observed the missionary's
character, his way of life, and his attitude toward
Muslims, I knew that the accusations I had heard against
Christians certainly did not apply to him. This made me
think. Was his love greater than that of the Muslims?
Had the Messiah Jesus done more for him than my
prophet had done for me? I was confused for I held the
11

opinion that apart from Muslims, anyone else, including
the Christians who believe that God is the Messiah, is an
unbeliever (kafir) and is rejected by God. As the Qur'an
says:

They surely disbelieve who say: Lo! Allah is the
Messiah, son of Mary. The Messiah (himself) said: O
Children of Israel, worship Allah, my Lord and your
Lord. Lo! Whoso ascribeth partners unto Allah, for him
Allah hath forbidden Paradise. His abode is the Fire. For
evil-doers there will be no helpers.
They surely disbelieve who say: Lo! Allah is the third
of three; when there is no God save the'One God. If they
desist not from so saying a painful doom will fall on
those of them who disbelieve. (5:72, 73)
I remembered also how I thought that because I was a
Muslim who had submitted myself to God, I was holier
than Christians. But as I became more aware of my own
12

sinfulness, I realized that the missionary was the one who
had submitted himself to God, for his character proved
it. I could tell that his love came from Jesus Christ, just as
"The Heart of Pak" had described it.
Like a magnet the love of Jesus attracted me. I
thought that if Jesus were my master too, how I would
love him! Yet, when the idea of becoming a Christian
crossed my mind, I rejected it as an evil thought from
Satan —for I was a Muslim.
I returned from Sunday School in great fear. I was
ready to accept whatever my father did to me, but for
two days nothing happened. On the third day, after
school my father caught me and threw me into a bush.
Then he seized a stick and beat me so severely that I
almost died. My mother ran to rescue me, but she was
beaten also. It was only by the grace of God that I
recovered. Again I confessed the Muslim creed and
promised my father that I would have no more contact
with Christians. Was my confession only an escape from
further beating?
My friend Abdullah had spread this news throughout
the district, and my life became very difficult. People
jeered at me, called me names, and even threw stones at
me. On the way home from school they called out,
"There goes the cursed one!" and "Here comes Mathai,
the Nasrani (Christian)!" Even my relatives, friends, and
teachers were cruel to me. I was confused, weary, lonely,
and troubled. During this period the Holy Gospel was
my only constant companion. Every time I had an
opportunity, I went to the forest to read and study it.
13

Again the old tension arose in my heart as I read the
Gospel in secret. On essential points it clearly differed
from my own Islamic beliefs. How puzzling for a Muslim
and yet how thought-provoking were the following
words of Jesus!
"I am the way and the truth and the life. No-
one comes to the Father except through me."
John 14:6
"Now this is eternal life: that they may know
you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ,
whom you have sent." John 17:3
"Yet to all who received him, to those who
believed in his name, he gave the right to
become children of God." John 1:12
"If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching.
My Father will love him, and we will come to
him and make our home with him." John 14:23
I had no one who could explain the meaning of these
verses to me. Yet I continued to ask God for guidance.
CHAINED BY LOVE
The pain and wounds of my body were healed, but the
marks produced by the love of the Christians and the
effects of the booklet remained. I felt something forcing
me to renew this friendship and decided to meet my
friends again. As I set out, relatives and neighbors saw
14

me, and I felt afraid. In fact, I decided to leave that place.
When I reached the home of the missionary, I shared my
problems with him. I showed him the scars of my
wounds and asked him to help me to go to Mysore where
my married sister lived. My sister loved me, and she and
her husband would let me stay there. The missionary,
however, advised me to return home. He told me that
later, when I became older, I could leave. Until then, I
should live quietly at home, and growing in faith and
love, influence my family and friends. God, he said,
would be my Savior, Protector, and Friend. At that time
I was in the seventh standard at school.
Since it was evening and I was afraid, I begged them to
let me stay overnight in the Christian reading-room. I
stayed there an extra day with my friend C.R. George.
Some people from my area, knowing that I was there,
came with the police to get me. They asked my friend to
give me up, and even accused him of kidnapping me. He
replied, " Alavi is here of his own accord. You can take
him, but do not beat him any more." When some
Muslims came to the support of their Christian friends in
the reading-room, a quarrel started among the Muslims
themselves. While they were all arguing, I ran out the
back door and across the field, jumped into a canal, and
pretended that I was taking a bath.
After a while some Muslims came and found me.
They took me to a Muslim reading-room called
"MAPPILA NADU'" where they asked questions,
shouted at me, and abused me. During this time, my
mother had been searching for me in the homes of my
15

relatives. Just at that moment my brother-in-law found
me and rescued me. As soon as we reached home, my
father sent my younger sister to call my uncles. By this
time a crowd of people had gathered in front of my
house.
When they had all come together, my father asked
each one, "What shall we do with Alavi? We have tried
our best to keep him away from Christians. What else
can we do?" The first uncle told my father to kill me by
cutting my throat. The second uncle decisively answered
the same. The third had a different idea. He suggested
death by starvation. If they killed me as my first uncle
had said, the whole family would go to jail. Then my
mother cried out, "Kill me first and then my son!" This
made me cry bitterly. I cannot describe the pain and fear
that was in my heart while I wondered what they would
do to me. Then the group accepted the advice of the third
uncle. One of my uncles then beat me cruelly until my
father stopped him. My father then tied my hands
behind my back, and I stayed like that for three weeks.
He ordered that I should be given food only once a day,
but when he was away, my mother gave me food.
One day my father and his younger brother came
home, along with a blacksmith. My uncle asked me to
confess the Muslim creed again before my father. The
words would not come out of my mouth. My mother,
sisters, and others shouted at me to recite it, but still I
could not. I do not know what happened to me. I could
not speak. Finally, my father ordered the blacksmith to
place two iron shackles and a chain on my legs and lock
16

it. I was chained up like this for the next six weeks. My
former friend Abdulla, who had torn up his booklet,
visited me and asked me what had made me do this. He
knew it was the booklet! I did not answer him, but as I
lay chained, I remembered the words of the Holy
Gospel:
"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in
God; trust also in me." John 14:1
"Then you will know the truth, and the truth
will set you free." John 8:32
When I looked at my chains, was I mocking myself in
recalling these words of Jesus? Perhaps it is in such hard
circumstances as these that we best experience the com-
fort of Jesus. He was very near to me, even more so than
when I secretly read these words from the Gospel in the
forest.
GOD DELIVERS ME
After six weeks I escaped. My mother's cousin helped
me. One day, when no one else was at home, he broke
open the chains. From that time on, I was allowed to be
free since no one wanted to chain me again. In fact, my
family and relatives treated me kindly. For two weeks I
remained at home. Yet I wondered why I should live in a
home and community that created more fear than peace
in my heart. I made up my mind to leave.
17

One day, after my noon meal, I looked at my mother's
face and my eyes filled with tears — for my mother did
not know my plan. It was my farewell to my home. I told
my mother I was going to take a bath and left the house.
May God forgive me for telling this and other lies that I
should never have told! I walked nearly ten miles to a
railway station TIRUR and caught a train to the city of
Calicut, thirty miles away. There I wandered about
looking for work. At last I found a job in a cafe. But my
life continued to be very unsettled.
Later I learned that during my imprisonment, my
Christian friends shared my sufferings. They were pray-
ing for me and trying to find some way of helping me but
could not. In the meantime, Muslim religious leaders
commanded the people to stay away from the Christian
Mission Compound and to withdraw their children from
the nursery school. My friends were attacked by name
over the loudspeaker. Guards were placed at the com-
pound gates to see that no one entered. Muslims were
allowed to go only to attend the Christian dispensary for
treatment. Soon, however, the situation returned to
normal. Over another loudspeaker someone called out,
"Let us stop troubling the Christians and pay more
attention to the works of Allah!" After some weeks the
trouble ended.
The owner of the cafe, a Muslim, was not pleased
when I enrolled in another Bible correspondence course.
I continued to work in the cafe for five months. Then I
left Calicut and went to my sister's home in Mysore.
There I wrote a letter to my friend George who told my
18

other friends. This was the first news they had that God
had delivered me from my chains. I ended my letter with
the words, "I am all right. I keep praying the Lord's
Prayer."
After working a year at Mysore with my brother-in-
law and another eighteen months on a merchant ship out
of Calicut, I returned to my own area. Again I met my
friend and other friends who were happy to see me. I
could not meet the missionary because he had returned
to his homeland. From there I returned to Mysore where
my brother-in-law employed me in his hotel. Then
through his recommendation I obtained an apprentice's
post as a lineman in the telegraph department. But again
misfortune struck. Hip trouble forced me to give up this
job.
I decided to return to Malabar for medical treatment.
By this time my friend was working in a mission hospital.
He helped me obtain a medical examination. The
missionary, who had now come back to India, was very
glad to see me and asked about all that had happened to
me while I was in chains and during my wanderings. He
told me that many people had been praying for me. Then
he gave me an introduction to another missionary who
could help me with my physical problem. I was very
happy to meet this new friend. Later he became one of
my spiritual fathers, and his wife became my spiritual
mother. With the help of this missionary and a doctor, I
was able to go for treatment to the Christian Medical
College Hospital in Vellore.
After I returned from the hospital, I joined the India
19

Every Home Crusade at Mysore for three months. In
this way I could distribute tracts and share the good news
of Christ. When my sister and her husband came to
know about this, however, they were angry and forbade
me to come to their house. The missionary then found a
place for me to stay with a Christian pastor and his
family at Gundulupet. It was a wonderful experience to
be with them, and I had the opportunity to study Chris-
tian doctrine for four months. After this I joined a
bookmobile project with the India Evangelical Lutheran
Church and spent a year distributing Christian books in
different parts of South India. God was leading me into
his service.
I was eager to study the Bible in more detail, so I
joined a one year Bible course at Concordia Seminary,
Nagercoil, in June, 1970.1 remember how glad I was to
have this chance to study the Bible! In the library there I
also found many good books on Islam which helped me
to clear many of my doubts.
FINDING THE LIGHT
Now at college I was able to study, and I concentrated
on the Person and work of Christ. I did this by studying
again the passages in the Qur'an that spoke of Christ in
the light of my growing faith in Jesus and increasing
knowledge of the Bible.
One of my chief doubts concerned the sinlessness of
Jesus and his authority to forgive the sins of others. It
20

was difficult to avoid the contrast between the sinlessness
of Jesus and the Quranic records of the sins of the other
prophets. Thus the Qur'an, addressing Muhammad in
particular, says:
"That God may forgive thee thy former and thy latter
sins, and complete His blessing upon thee, and guide
thee on a straight path." (48:2) (CF: 40:55; 47:19)
Since no laden soul can bear another's burden (35:18)
then how can he or anyone of these prophets bear an-
other's burden?
But the Qur'an^quoting the angel Jibra'il, says of
Mary's son:
"He said, I am only a messenger of thy Lord, that I
may bestow on thee a faultless son." (19:19)
This fact is supported by a Hadith which says: "Each
human baby is touched by Satan's finger at birth, save
Mariam and her son."
The Injil also clearly indicates the purity and sinless-
ness of Jesus. "Can any of you prove me guilty of Sin? If
I am telling the truth, why don't you believe me?"
21

(John 8:46) The Injil further states that he takes away
our sins:
"Everyone who sins breaks the law; in fact, sin is
lawlessness. But you know that he (Jesus) appeared to
take away our sins. And in him is no sin." (1 John 3:4,5)
Was it in order to bear the burdens of others that Jesus
himself was an unburdened soul? Though the Qur'an
declares Jesus as pure, it really offers no clue to the
purpose of God in bestowing upon Mary a faultless son.
Further the Qur'an attributes qualities to Jesus which
it attributes to no other prophets or apostles. He is
described as God's Word and a spirit from God:
"O People of the Scripture! Do not exaggerate in your
religion, nor utter aught concerning Allah save the truth.
The Messiah Jesus son of Mary, was only a messenger of
Allah, and His Word, which He conveyed unto Mary,
and a spirit from Him. So believe in Allah and His
22

messenger and say not 'Three' — Cease! (it is) better for
you! — Allah is only One God..." (4:171)
Thus also the angel Jibra'il addresses Mary with the
following words:
"... He said: So (it will be). Thy Lord saith: It is easy
for Me. And (it will be that We may make of him a
revelation for mankind and a mercy from Us, and it is a
thing ordained." (19:21 cf. 21:91)
Whatever else the Qur'an has stated about Jesus, it
surely has established him as a unique person: his rela-
tion to God as God's Word and a spirit from God; his
creative activities, his healings, his raising of the dead
(3:49); his ascension into heaven and his presence in
heaven today.
Through further study I also began to understand
how the Biblical significance of the term "son of God"
differs from the Quranic understanding of "son of God."
The Qur'an denies that God begets, or is begotten, in a
physical sense (Lam yalidwa lamyulad). In this sense the
Bible also rejects the term "son of God"-. Eventually,
however, I accepted that Jesus could be called "the Son
of God" (as the Bible explains this term) in a spiritual
23

sense, in the same way that he is called God's Word.
Here again I was grateful to the Qur'an for serving as a
bridge to a fuller comprehension of the Biblical signifi-
cance of the term "Son of God" when uniquely applied
to Jesus.
No doubt, on the basis of Surat un-Nissa, Muslims
have rejected the Biblical account of Jesus' death, res-
urrection and ascension:

"And because of their saying: We slew the Messiah
Jesus son of Mary, Allah's messenger — They slew him
not nor crucified, but it appeared so unto them; and lo!
those who disagree concerning it are in doubt thereof;
they have no knowledge thereof save pursuit of a con-
jecture; they slew him not for certain..." (4:157-159)
Elsewhere, of course, the Qur'an refers to the death of
Jesus. But Muslim expositors offer conflicting opinions
on some of these relevant verses. The following are
significant passages, as translated by Pickthall:
24

"Peace on me the day I was born, and the day I die,
and the day I shall be raised alive!" (19:33)
"(And remember) when Allah said: O Jesus! Lo! I am
gathering thee and causing thee to ascend unto Me, and
am cleansing thee~of those who disbelieve and am setting
those who follow thee above those who disbelieve until
the Day of Resurrection. Then unto Me ye will (all)
return, and I am judge between you as to that wherein ye
used to differ." (3:55)
"I spake unto them only that which Thou command-
est me, (saying) Worship Allah, my Lord and your Lord.
I was a witness of them while I dwelt among them, and
when Thou tookest me Thou wast the Watcher over
them. Thou art Witness over all things." (5:117)
25

But is Picktall's interpretation of mutawaffika ("I am
gathering thee": 3:55) and tawaffaitani ("Thou tookest
me": 5:117) correct? Some respectable Muslim commen-
taries translate this verb: "to cause to die," indicating
that the death of Jesus preceded his ascension into
heaven.
In any event the Biblical accounts leave no room for
various interpretations about the time, place and circum-
stances of Jesus' death. He was crucified, he died, and he
was buried. His crucifixion took place outside the walls
of Jerusalem. It happened when Pilate was governor of
Judea. These are facts of history. The Bible repeatedly
refers to the death of Jesus in unambiguous language.
Just as clear in the Bible is the connection of the death'of
Jesus with his resurrection from the dead and his ascen-
sion, as well as the intent of these three great events in his
life.
Thus these and other passages of the Qur'an became
clear to me in the light of my reflection on the New
Testament portrayal of Christ. Not only did all these
passages reveal the special relation which Jesus had with
God; surely they indicated also God's special purpose in
sending Jesus, his Word and Servant, into this sinful
world. Once more I recalled the booklet, "The Heart of
Pak." I concluded that God has spoken his word of
forgiveness to all sinners through Jesus alone, through
his death on the cross and his resurrection from the dead.
As I read the Bible more and more, it spoke to me and
cleared my doubts, one by one.
Yet this question perplexed my mind: What about
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Muhammad whose coming, according to the Qur'an,
Jesus had prophesied?
"And when Jesus son of Mary said: O Children of
Israel! Lo! I am the messenger of Allah unto you,
confirming that which was (revealed) before me in the
Torah, and bringing good tidings of a messenger who
cometh after me, whose name is the Praised One. Yet
when he hath come unto them with clear proofs, they
say: This is mere magic." (61:6)
The Arabic for "Praised One" is ahmad, which has the
same root meaning as Muhammad. Does this passage not
mean that Jesus prophesied the coming of Muhammad?
That is what I had been taught and believed.
I examined the Bible to see what it says about Mu-
hammad, but I could find nothing. I asked my professors
the^ame question and they too said that there is nothing.
But when I looked into a Muslim commentary on the
Qur'an, it quoted several Bible passages in support of
this understanding of Surah 61:6. The main passage
quoted was:
"And I will pray the Father, and He shall give you
another counsellor, to be with you forever." (John 14:16)
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The Greek word for Counsellor is Parakletos. (Greek
is the original language of the Injil.) The commentator
said that the original Greek word was perikultos, which
means "Praised One." Christians, he said, substituted
Parakletos for Periklutos to remove the reference to the
prophet Muhammad.
I did not know Greek, and since it was really difficult
for me to give up faith in Muhammad, I felt really
troubled. Muhammad still held a great place in my heart,
and I found it hard to give up that belief in him as a
prophet. I asked the Greek professor about these words.
He replied that the word periklutos is not in the Greek
text of St. John. He then explained clearly the original
Biblical word, Parakletos, and how the promise of Jesus
(John 14:16) was fulfilled by the coming of the Holy
Spirit (Acts 2:1-11) who lives always with God's people
as their Comforter and Guide.
I placed the problem before God and asked him to
give me clear understanding. One night, after I had
prayed and gone to bed, I could not sleep. I heard a voice
or felt as though I had heard a voice. It said, "Get up and
read!" I thought it was only my imagination. But I heard
it again and again. I got up and opened my Bible. Several
times I read the passage in John 14:15-17:
"If you love me, you will obey what I
command. I will ask the Father, and he will give
you another Counsellor to be with you for ever
— the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept
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him, because it neither sees him nor knows him.
But you know him, for he lives with you and
will be in you."
As I read these verses, many questions came into my
mind. Did you read in the Qur'an or Hadith, I asked
myself, that Muhammad is the Spirit of truth who is
always with you, a Counsellor whom the world cannot
see nor know, or who lives inside you? Then I realized
that these words do not contain any prophecy of a
coming prophet and cannot possibly be applied to any
human being. Moreover, I remembered the fulfillment
of that prophecy in Acts 2:1-11, during the life of the
first believers in Christ. Now I understood this great
truth. The Counsellor whom Jesus promised is the Holy
Spirit, the eternal Spirit of the Living God, not the angel
Jibra'il.
Later I experienced the power of the Holy Spirit in my
own life. Through him I came to Christ. Glory to God!
Amen!
I continued to read the Holy Bible with care and
attention. In it I found treasure such as I had never
dreamed of — it has the power to speak to those who
really want to find God's revelation and guidance. It
showed me my real self, my sinful and guilty heart, and
showed me also that I was spiritually blind. It asked me
to bring all my sins and problems to God in the name of
Jesus the Messiah. He came to this world searching for
me! He died for my sins and rose again; he went up to
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heaven, and he will come again. I became convinced that
the Holy Bible is indeed the Word of God.
The Holy Bible brought the answers to the problems
which worried me. Its living water was able to satisfy my
soul. What I had never found before in my religious
experience, I now discovered. I became sure that the
Holy Bible faithfully and accurately recorded the works
and teaching of Jesus — this mystery of God's eternal
Word coming into our world as man. Now I became
convinced of the truth of his death, resurrection, ascen-
sion, and second corning, which before I had not under-
stood and had even hated. The Bible contains the mes-
sage of God's power to save, and his love for me and all
men, and this brings us peace. This love of God focuses
sharply on Jesus, his death and resurrection for sinners
— as Paul, echoing Jesus and his other apostles, says in
the New Testament,
"For what I received I passed on to you as of
first importance: that Christ died for our sins
according to the Scriptures, that he was buried,
that he was raised on the third day according to
the Scriptures." I Corinthians 15:3, 4
No doubt, many Muslim friends will continue to think
that the Holy Bible is corrupt and abrogated by the
Qur'an.
Yet let him — especially if he is conscious of God's
holiness and his own sins — give serious thought to its
message. Then let him, as I have done, draw his own
conclusions.
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A GREAT DECISION
On July 19,1970,1 surrendered to Jesus the Messiah. I
confessed all my sins and my doubts, and by baptism I
was joined to him and his forgiving love. My whole body
trembled. I could feel divine power entering into me. I
rose from my knees a changed man with peace in my
soul, joy in my heart, and assurance in my mind. And
today I still have that same joy, hope, and assurance.
Although I could not explain it, in my heart I believed
that all my sins were washed away through the precious
blood of Jesus Christ, that I had received power for a
new life of love, and that the Lord Jesus himself was
reigning in my heart.
IN HIS SERVICE
Soon the opportunity came to work with a group
called Operation Mobilization. This gave me a chance to
go to different parts of India to tell the Good News. I
continued to do this for about two years. During that
time I learned more about what it means to be a follower
of Jesus. I am grateful to the Lord and to my friends in
Operation Mobilization who gave me the opportunity to
work with them. They helped me during difficult times.
Later I went back to Concordia Theological Seminary
and completed my theological studies in 1975.
My present concern is to bring the Good News of
God's light to my own people wherever they are, espe-
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daily in my own area. May they accept the invitation of
Jesus Christ which he gives to all to know the great
Salvation of God.
"I am the way and the truth and the life. No^-
one comes to the Father except through me."
John 14:6
"Now this is eternal life: that they may know
you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ,
whom you have sent." John 17:3
"I am the light of the world. Whoever follows
me will never walk in darkness, but will have
the light of life." John 8:12
CONCLUSION
I have accepted Jesus Christ as my own Savior. He has
been able to change my life to a real life of happiness,
peace, and hope. He has been able to give me strength in
my weakness. As the living Lord, he comes into my life
to give it new purpose, and promises me life in heaven
that will never end. I know that I belong to God's
heavenly family. I believe what David, the great prophet
and king, said, "Though my father and mother forsake
me, the Lord will receive me" (Psalm 27:10).
In all my troubles, doubts and temptations it is
enough to look into his face. In times when I have been
lonely, tired, and disappointed, I have praised him for
his grace.
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Jesus said:
"You did not choose me, but I chose you to go
and bear fruit — fruit that will last. Then the
Father will give you whatever you ask in my
name." John 15:16
I did not choose him, but he chose me. Through him
the story of Pak has become the story of Alavi. To God
be the glory for ever and ever. Amen.
If I can help you, please write to me at this address:
Markaz Ul Bishara P.O. Box 18
Manjeri 676121 -Kerala, S.India

In an acceptable time
I have heard you,
and in the
DAY OF SALVATION
I have helped you.

is the day of
SALVATION.
2. Corinthians 6:2